03 Sep Recovery Spotlight: Mike’s Story
My name is Michael Householder and I have the disease of addiction. For 20 plus years I suffered from a hopeless state of mind and body, like a tornado I tore through everyone and everything I came in contact with. I was trying to escape; I wanted to be anyone except who I was. I could never get away from myself, or the voices in my head that greeted me every morning. I was full of fear, but could only express my feeling in anger so I could protect myself from anyone who might get too close to me, and see my pain. I came to the conclusion that being a drug addict must be my destiny and that I was doomed to die a lonely tragic death.
One summer morning in June 2008, I was awakened by my girlfriend’s mother who told me I could no longer stay at their home. This was not the first time I was asked to leave someone’s house, because I always looked to take advantage of anybody’s kindness. But this day was different. In a moment of clarity I realized this was my bottom and I had reached the lowest point in my life. I had $10, a van that did not belong to me, and the clothes on my back. I remembered I had a phone number of a guy I met at a 12-Step meeting. I swallowed my pride and called him. I asked him to help me and told him I didn’t want to do this any more. The first question he asked me was, “are you willing to go to any lengths”. I answered, “yes.” He gave me instructions to drive to a state funded rehab, and with $10 in my pocket, I did just that.
Upon arriving to the rehab, they would not accept me; I had no ID, no insurance and had felony warrants. But, I tried and was willing. When we realized I couldn’t get into rehab and I had nowhere to stay, he put me up in a motel room. He picked me up and took me to a Cocaine Anonymous meeting. Then, he introduced me to a guy who gave me a job detailing cars. That night after the meeting, he fed me, gave me a Big Book, a spiral notebook, and a pen. He instructed me to read the Dr.’s Opinion and would come visit me after work. For the next month the members of that Cocaine Anonymous group gave me rides to work and to meetings. Soon after, the guy I called that day in despair became my sponsor.
I realized that the Big Book, spiral notebook, and pen were to be put to use. We met every chance we got and I worked the 12 Steps of Cocaine Anonymous in 90 days. I was assigned a service commitment and took meetings into a detox every Friday night in downtown Dallas, TX. I was told to get a Sponsee and to take them through the steps, just like what was done with me. I had been given the solution to my problems, and I no longer had the obsession to use or drink. It was the first time that I can recall being comfortable in my own skin. I was happy, content, and felt useful. All the promises in the Big Book came true.
I just celebrated 7 years of life. I went back to school and earned a degree in Human Services, and became licensed as a Substance Abuse Counselor. My life is more than I could’ve dreamed of and more! I continue to carry the message of hope to those who still suffer from a hopeless state of mind and body.
“Abandon yourself to God, as you understand God. Admit your faults to Him and to your fellows, clear away the wreckage of your past. Give freely what you find and join us. We shall be with you in the fellowship of the spirit, and you will surely meet some of us as we trudge the Road of Happy Destiny. May God bless you and keep you until then. “ (Big Book of A.A. Pg. 164 A Vision For You)